By lunaKM on August 18, 2010
From the Submissive Guide Newsletter 2/6/10 (Caveat: I am not an expert historian of BDSM. What I have learned I picked up along the way. I can’t say with certainty what is true and what is false. I have made every effort to let you know if I’m uncertain of the validity of a certain [...]
Posted in Newsletter Archive, Social Norms | Tagged acceptance, chat rooms, community, danger, false information, Impact, internet, munch, purpose, submissive guide newsletter |
By lunaKM on August 13, 2010
This video post is about an epidemic I’ve seen with submissives all over. A submissive, dating and seeing Dominants; rarely going past the first few dates can begin to wonder why they are constantly searching and never finding someone to serve. You can develop a closed heart and begin to fear opening yourself up for [...]
Posted in Video Posts | Tagged dates, dating, dominant, emotions, fear, feelings, Impact, relationship, sensitive, vulnerability |
By Guest Author on January 8, 2010
This is a guest post by bgtreasure for the BDSM Play Feature Series here on Submissive Guide. I choose this topic to write about because it is my favorite form of play and has been since I’ve found this wonderful thing we call “The Lifestyle”. The general definition of Impact Play that you will find [...]
Posted in BDSM Basics | Tagged BDSM, bdsm lifestyle, bdsm play, bdsm play feature, bgtreasure, connection, cons, edge play, event, experience, favorite, feature series, fetlife, fists, floggers, focus, guest post, hands, help, Impact, impact play, lifestyle, love, munch, normal, owned, paddles, play, positions, relationship, rt, series, share, spanking, stress, submissive, subspace, wants, whips |
By lunaKM on January 6, 2010
One of every submissive’s first experiences happens to be in the bedroom or dungeon. That’s why this month I’d like to focus on the joys and pleasures of the things we can explore during scenes and play. The next few weeks we’ll be hearing about a variety of BDSM activities. Just about every post is [...]
Posted in Playtime | Tagged activities, BDSM, bdsm activities, bdsm play feature, bgtreasure, caning, dani, experience, favorite, feature series, focus, guest post, guest posts, Gwendolyn, Impact, impact play, Nadia West, play, Playtime, scene, series, submissive, writing |
By lunaKM on January 2, 2010
This week’s video post is about velcro collars. To submissives, a collar is one of the most important things they have. It is a symbol of their commitment, their service and their adoration of a special someone. In most situations, the offering or begging of a collar is not taken lightly. The weight of the [...]
Posted in Video Posts | Tagged begging, cheapen, collars, commitment, community, cons, disposable, Dom, dominant, dominants, experience, hands, Impact, important things, lifetime, marriage, mates, online, opinion, partners, relationship, Relationships, rt, rules, Service, submissive, symbolism, value, velcro collars |
By lunaKM on November 23, 2009
One of the cornerstone books recommended for submissives and Dominants alike has always been Erotic Slavehood by Christina Abernathy. Once two individual books; Miss Abernathy’s Concise Slave Training Manual and Training with Miss Abernathy, this omnibus has everything you could want in a manual about training submissives. When I first read this book I was [...]
Posted in Reviews | Tagged amazon.com, book, books, Dom, dominant, dominant partner, dominants, Impact, information, m/s, Miss Abernathy, relationship, review, rt, Service, single, slave, slave training, standing, submissive, training, understanding |
By lunaKM on November 9, 2009
When aftercare is mentioned, it is rarely associated with the Dominant. We hear all about how to help the submissive come down from the endorphin high, treat the marks and aches and emotionally recover from the scene. Do we think that Dominants feel nothing during play that they don’t need care afterwards? Think again. When [...]
Posted in Playtime | Tagged aftercare, bdsm play, connection, control, Dom, dominant, dominant aftercare, dominant recovery, dominants, endorphins, energy, experience, focus, help, Impact, marks, needs, partner focus, play, recovery from play, relationship, rt, scene, sex, shower, submissive, trust |
By lunaKM on October 16, 2009
A very common first request of a potential Dominant, either online or offline is to have you start a submissive journal. If you’ve never kept a diary then this can be a daunting task. Having to write openly and honestly about your feelings and experiences can have a huge impact on your submissive and personal [...]
Posted in Mindset, Service | Tagged blogging, choice, comfort, development, Dom, dominant, experience, help, Impact, journaling, needs, online, online journal, personal development, relationship, rt, submission, submissive, tasks, writing |
By lunaKM on October 14, 2009
Being an emotionally healthy person is a goal that all of us have but a smaller margin actually accomplish. With the constant stress of commitments and modern day obligations our emotions face the brunt of it. The goal of a submissive is to seek that balance in emotional states so that our service appears stress-free [...]
Posted in Health and Beauty | Tagged balance, comfort, commitment, cons, control, desires, emotional health, emotional state, emotions, friends, friendships, happiness, health, healthy submissive, help, Impact, memories, mental strength, needs, online, relationship, Relationships, rt, Service, stress, submissive, suggestions |
By lunaKM on August 27, 2009
Our first chat was a great success. Everyone gave permission to post the transcript and continue the conversation here. I loved every minute of interesting conversation. Read and enjoy! <~luna[KM]> Alright, let’s get started. If you haven’t figured out, I’m luna. I started the site in January after I got tired of not finding what [...]
Posted in Views & More... | Tagged abuse, acceptance, BDSM, BDSM and sex, Bondage, book, chat, chat night, community, connection, cons, control, D/s, Dom, Dominance, email, experience, fantasy, fear, focus, Impact, impact play, information, IRC, kink acceptance, kinky, lifestyle, love, masochist, online, opinion, owned, play, play parties, relationship, Relationships, ritual, rt, scene, scening, separation, Service, sex, sexual encounters, share, sharing, spirit, spiritual, standing, stereotype, submission, submissive chat, support, transcript, understanding, wants |
By lunaKM on May 6, 2009
Every so often I want to open up the blog for you to share and teach me on a topic that I don’t know a lot about. This is your chance to teach me and the other readers of this blog. I encourage you to comment, subscribe to the comments and keep coming back to [...]
Posted in Relationships, Roundtable Discussions | Tagged activities, book, cons, event, experience, friendships, hands, Impact, jealousy, lifestyle, limits, marriage, open marriages, open relationships, partners, poly, polyamory, questions, relationship, Relationships, rt, rules, safe, Safety, sex, sexual encounters, share |
By lunaKM on March 23, 2009
If you’ve been around the BDSM and D/s scene at all there is one of many books that always comes up in conversation as a good book to read when you are new to the whole lifestyle. This book is Screw the Roses, Send Me the Thorns: The Romance and Sexual Sorcery of Sadomasochism by [...]
Posted in Reviews | Tagged abuse, advice, amazon.com, basics, BDSM, Bondage, book, books, community, cons, consensual, D/s, danger, Dom, Dominance, dominant, emotions, endorphins, etiquette, experience, explanations, female, help, Impact, impact play, information, kinky, learning, library, lifestyle, limits, love, manners, Masochism, molly devon, negotiation, novice, novices, philip miller, play, player, recommended reading, relationship, Relationships, review, roles, romance, rt, safe, Safety, sane, scene, screw the roses, sex, SSC, standing, submission, submissive, support, tips, toy, toys, tricks, understanding |
By lunaKM on February 6, 2009
Everyone has a defining moment where BDSM becomes a part of your life in some form or another. It doesn’t have to mean that you are completely immersed into a D/s relationship right away. A lot of us start out just kinky in the bedroom. The idea of being submissive as a part of your [...]
Posted in BDSM Basics | Tagged BDSM, D/s, defining moment, development, future growth, future plans, help, Impact, kinky, lifestyle, marriage, play, relationship, rt, sex, submission, submissive, training |
By lunaKM on January 23, 2009
Topping from the bottom is a misunderstood term in BDSM, especially if you are a novice. The idea behind the term is to actually help submissives understand their role, and isn’t more than a faux paus. During interactions with your Dominant, it’s a lesson to know that you can’t control what is going on. Topping [...]
Posted in BDSM Basics | Tagged abuse, BDSM, bottom, choice, conditional submission, control, D/s, desires, Dom, Dominance, dominant, dynamics, help, Impact, needs, nonverbal clues, novice, owned, play, relationship, requests, roles, rt, safe, safewords, Service, share, submission, submissive, topping from the bottom, toy |
By lunaKM on January 7, 2009
In the previous post about wants and needs you made a list of your wants and a list of your needs so that you had them defined for your training resume. In this essay I will share why needs are so important to your overall health and happiness in a relationship and why settling for [...]
Posted in Submission, Training Resume | Tagged abuse, balance, clean, clothing, comfort, communication, compatibility, cons, control, D/s, depression, development, discussion, Dom, dominant, event, experience, friends, friendships, happiness, health, help, honesty, Impact, importance of needs, love, needs, openness, power exchange, relationship, Relationships, resume, rt, sadness, safe, Safety, security, share, stress, submission, submissive, training, Training Resume, trust, wants |
I’m totally fine with the variety of approaches to comments – however I want to communicate to readers of this blog where I stand: I love comments on this blog – they are as important as anything I write myself. They add to the knowledge and community that we have here. If you want to [...]
Want more? Get my free report "Wants and Needs: How to Get What You Need and Ask For What You Want"...
This month I'd like to feature Protocols: Handbook for the female slave by Robert Rubel PhD. A book on protocol in a D/s Leather Household.
My name is lunaKM and I’m a full-time submissive in a D/s relationship. I am webslut to 
