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Articles for tag 'fear'

Articles

Fear in Submission

Fear in Submission

Fear can be good, because it makes us take a moment and stop and think about what we’re about to do, especially when that thing we’re about to do is stepping out of our comfort zone. Making the decision to submit, is definitely one of those decisions.

1 comment Posted by tequilarose | Posted in: Community, Personal Growth, Relationships
I’m Afraid of My Long Distance Dom

I’m Afraid of My Long Distance Dom

For fear of angering him I submit and abide by this punishment, leaving me more stressed I have fallen in love with my dom, I am not allowed to call him by name. I feel I m pushed up against a wall at all times. What should I do?

3 comments Posted by lunaKM | Posted in: Ask Anything, Relationships, Safety
DIY: Knife & Blood Play

DIY: Knife & Blood Play

Trigger Warning: Blood play, cutting, blood and knives When I first filled out my BDSM checklist, I felt entirely insufficient. For every one activity that I really wanted to try, there were two that I said I never wanted to try. There seemed to be infinitely more zeros (which indicated hard limits) than threes (which [...]

6 comments Posted by andyiccee | Posted in: Play and Sex, Safety
Accepting Fear through Obedience

Accepting Fear through Obedience

This is a guest post by kaya of Underhishand.com. For Master. When I used to say “Oh I want someone who can push me.. who doesn’t stop when I say stop.. who does what they want and aren’t guided by MY reactions”, I can honestly say that I never believed such a person existed. I [...]

6 comments Posted by Guest Author | Posted in: Beginner Basics, Relationships
Ask lunaKM – Fear of Losing Yourself, Poor Contact Frequency and Sending Nude Pictures

Ask lunaKM – Fear of Losing Yourself, Poor Contact Frequency and Sending Nude Pictures

Dear lunaKM, My husband and I have been playing in the BDSM lifestyle for several months now.  I love the idea of this but have always had a strong personality.  I love to please him and want to be a good submissive to him but I fear losing myself or for it to go too [...]

3 comments Posted by lunaKM | Posted in: Ask Anything
"Barbed Wire" Image courtesy of nuttakit at FreeDigitalPhotos.net

Single In The Scene Part VI: Vulnerability

I’m of the opinion that there are many slaves who are unowned for one reason: fear of being vulnerable. The way relationships tend to flow in the vanilla world vulnerability isn’t a necessity to maintain the relationship. Usually most are not surrendering to their partners and both tend to rest assured that they are equals [...]

1 comment Posted by charmed blyss | Posted in: Beginner Basics, Mindset, Personal Growth, Relationships, Service
Ask lunaKM – Compatibility, Safewords when Deaf and Power Play Preferences

Ask lunaKM – Compatibility, Safewords when Deaf and Power Play Preferences

Dear lunaKM, I’m a complete newbie when it comes to the D/s world. January of this year I met my very first Dominant online. He was sweet and attentive yet firm. We live in two different states but I had decided to move to His town to be closer to Him. I did everything in [...]

Leave a comment Posted by lunaKM | Posted in: Ask Anything
Single in the Scene Part V: The Truth about Singlehood

Single in the Scene Part V: The Truth about Singlehood

This is kinda pithy, so please hang in there! In this series thus far, I’ve done my absolute best to keep it positive. Maybe in some ways, I’ve managed to gloss over the ‘truth of singlehood’ of a slave, which in a way slightly misses the mark of my desire which is to help those [...]

4 comments Posted by charmed blyss | Posted in: Beginner Basics, Mindset, Personal Growth, Relationships
Ask lunaKM – Weakness and Triggers, 24/7 Start and Incompatibility

Ask lunaKM – Weakness and Triggers, 24/7 Start and Incompatibility

Dear lunaKM, I am new to the Submissive role and BDSM in general. To make a long story short I am finally with my best friend from high school 10 years later, after being through a hellish marriage for 5 years and a physically abusive relationship before that…I love my now boyfriend and he is [...]

3 comments Posted by lunaKM | Posted in: Ask Anything
Ask lunaKM – Pushing Limits, Exploring as a Top and Talking to Therapists

Ask lunaKM – Pushing Limits, Exploring as a Top and Talking to Therapists

Dear lunaKM, I am a new submissive.  I have been in a relationship with my Dominant for about a year.  I am struggling because my Dominant wants me to explore and push my limits.  He knows that I have had group sex experiences in my past and that they were not positive.   He knows [...]

1 comment Posted by lunaKM | Posted in: Ask Anything
Keys to a Successful Relationship-It’s All About Communication

Keys to a Successful Relationship-It’s All About Communication

This is the first in an ongoing series where I will be writing about key factors it takes to have a successful relationship. This first article is about the importance that communication plays in our relationships. Awhile ago, I came across this article in the NY Times about how BDSM has become a bit more [...]

6 comments Posted by tequilarose | Posted in: Beginner Basics
Having Enough Love for More than Just One Partner

Having Enough Love for More than Just One Partner

I was on Tumblr one morning and I came across a picture of Johnny Depp and something he had said. Now, I had seen this particular picture several times and thought nothing of it in the past, but this last time I stumbled across it, I got thinking. The more I thought about this quote, [...]

2 comments Posted by tequilarose | Posted in: Relationships
Little Known Ways We Experience Sub Space

Little Known Ways We Experience Sub Space

I admit that I used to whisper tales of sub space and the other blissful states that I’ve been in as if they were magical golden hours of submission.  I actually believed long ago that sub space is what made me a “real” submissive. Trust me, that bubble didn’t last long. Once it was popped [...]

6 comments Posted by lunaKM | Posted in: Play and Sex
Is The Influx of Bossy Newbies Killing Old School Traditions?

Is The Influx of Bossy Newbies Killing Old School Traditions?

My question is not so much specifically for a submissive, to be honest, i don’t know where to go about this. But after all i have read from you, Luna, i respect your opinions & views & thought you would be best to ask. I have noticed that in the last few years, so many [...]

3 comments Posted by lunaKM | Posted in: Ask Anything, Community

Dealing with Stress in a D/s Relationship

Today’s question is about handling when the D/s is shelved due to external (or internal) stress. Hi Luna, I wanted to ask you about when a relationship is going through a rough patch, and neither partner can seem to find it within them to fulfill their previous D/s roles. My Sir is dealing with a [...]

7 comments Posted by lunaKM | Posted in: Ask Anything, Relationships
Male Submission – Fantasy vs Reality

Male Submission – Fantasy vs Reality

In part 1 of my series of articles on male submission I wrote about one archetype of male submission “The Worm.”  For clarification, a large majority of male submissives do not fit that mindset as there are plenty of other dynamics. However, one topic which is common to many male submissives is that the fantasy [...]

25 comments Posted by ted_subby | Posted in: Male Submission
Daddy’s Little Girl – Exploring the Ageplay Dynamic

Daddy’s Little Girl – Exploring the Ageplay Dynamic

Since I have had a few articles published and have received such a warm and kind welcome from everyone, I have decided to tell you all a little secret that I’ve been hiding for some time now. The relationship that I have with my Master is more than just a Master/slave relationship. We also have [...]

28 comments Posted by tequilarose | Posted in: Beginner Basics, Community, Relationships
Don’t I Know You From Somewhere? – Encountering People You Know at a Munch

Don’t I Know You From Somewhere? – Encountering People You Know at a Munch

Some of the first advice that I give to someone wanting to get off the computer and into the local community is to attend a munch. But at the same time I know that attending a munch is a scary proposition. You will be meeting people you don’t know that are into kinky things, and [...]

Leave a comment Posted by lunaKM | Posted in: Community

Living M/s Book Club Wrap-Up Participation Showcase

We are all done with this book club, but if you are still reading feel free to comment on this or any of the previous week’s posts. Today I wanted to take some time and showcase all of the favorite quotes, some of the key thoughts and comments on the book from this event. Thank [...]

2 comments Posted by lunaKM | Posted in: Roundtable Discussions

[Video Post] How To Help Your Dominant Through Dom Drop

How do you care for a Dom/Master who is suffering dom drop?  What should a sub do to help them through this? It seems that they get reclusive.  Is this normal? Today’s Ask Anything question I thought I’d give special attention and make it a video post. A common conversation in BDSM circles is sub [...]

6 comments Posted by lunaKM | Posted in: Ask Anything, Video Posts
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