Mentoring, self-help and submissive exploration

Articles for tag 'development'

Articles

31 Days of Submissive Journaling – Day 4: What Can a Journal Do for My Submissive Development?

31 Days of Submissive Journaling – Day 4: What Can a Journal Do for My Submissive Development?

Let’s do an activity to figure out how a personal journal can help you in your submissive development.

Ornamental Value: A Reflection on My Submissive Style

Ornamental Value: A Reflection on My Submissive Style

Living with my Dom for a longer period of time has allowed us to develop some rough routines and expectations that we’ll continue to develop as time progresses, and these have begun to help me form answers to the questions that I’ve been asking on and off from the beginning of my submission.

1 comment Posted by kallista | Posted in: Beginner Basics
Being a Single Submissive in a Couple’s World

Being a Single Submissive in a Couple’s World

from the Submissive Guide Newsletter 1/18/14 When you are a single submissive it can feel like a lonely place. Every kinky place you go it seems like everyone is already in a relationship and there is no room for you. But that’s not true; and being a single submissive can be a special time in [...]

2 comments Posted by lunaKM | Posted in: Beginner Basics, Newsletter Archive
Submitting in a Long Distance Relationship: The Big Meet

Submitting in a Long Distance Relationship: The Big Meet

As I mentioned in my introduction to this series, online submission is a bit of a hot-button among D/s practitioners. There are a lot of great arguments for why it doesn’t work, and for each of those, there’s an equally strong counterargument for why it’s a perfectly valid arrangement; but chances are, unless you’re submitting [...]

5 comments Posted by kallista | Posted in: Beginner Basics, Relationships, Safety
Single in the Scene Part V: The Truth about Singlehood

Single in the Scene Part V: The Truth about Singlehood

This is kinda pithy, so please hang in there! In this series thus far, I’ve done my absolute best to keep it positive. Maybe in some ways, I’ve managed to gloss over the ‘truth of singlehood’ of a slave, which in a way slightly misses the mark of my desire which is to help those [...]

4 comments Posted by charmed blyss | Posted in: Beginner Basics, Mindset, Personal Growth, Relationships
Ask lunaKM – Protocol-Driven Leather Lifestyle, Adding Another Submissive and Starting a Submissive Journal

Ask lunaKM – Protocol-Driven Leather Lifestyle, Adding Another Submissive and Starting a Submissive Journal

Dear Luna, In response to your post “Influx of Bossy Newbies Killing Old School Traditions”, I wanted to ask: Where can I learn about the protocol-driven Leather Lifestyle? I’ve wanted to learn about it for some time. On FetLife I’ve seen other’s ask similar questions and each time they were answered with “Every relationship is [...]

2 comments Posted by lunaKM | Posted in: Ask Anything
Single in the Scene Part IV: Petitioning

Single in the Scene Part IV: Petitioning

This series is written from the perspective that being single in the Lifestyle affords one the opportunity to do some soul-searching, learning, and defining in order to be better equipped to transition into a suitable and desirable relationship in due time. Read - Part I: Boundaries,  Part II: Service, Part III: Slave Resume. So, now that [...]

A Slave’s Longing – Not Quite Frenzy

A Slave’s Longing – Not Quite Frenzy

I was going to do another Single in the Scene post, had been kicking it around, but then last week, I felt something else. And this week because this ‘something’ else is back, I’ve decided to go with this… A slave’s longing. A longing is not a frenzy, though it’s quite possible that the feeling [...]

11 comments Posted by charmed blyss | Posted in: Mindset, Relationships
[Video Post] Your Responsibilities As A Submissive Go Beyond ‘Obedience’

[Video Post] Your Responsibilities As A Submissive Go Beyond ‘Obedience’

I read a forum thread the other day that rubbed me the wrong way. So I thought I’d talk about it and share my opinion on the subject. I would love to hear how you would answer this same question. The topic was asking what a submissive’s/slave’s responsibilities were in a relationship. Out of the [...]

18 comments Posted by lunaKM | Posted in: Beginner Basics, Video Posts
Solo Coaching – Ask Yourself the Right Questions

Solo Coaching – Ask Yourself the Right Questions

It may not be clear to others by now but I’m pretty good at asking myself questions, and asking  questions for reflection with others. It’s how much of the topics I write come to be. I ask myself a question and then try to answer it. It’s an art that I’ve had to learn because [...]

1 comment Posted by lunaKM | Posted in: Personal Growth
Fictional Stories of Male Submission

Fictional Stories of Male Submission

Fictional BDSM stories or erotica are often not only enjoyable but also may be a good way to learn what might be enjoyable to the reader in real life.  Those who are new to BDSM often do not know what activities and mindsets they might enjoy and while non-fiction articles, blogs, and communities are a [...]

6 comments Posted by ted_subby | Posted in: Male Submission
How to Use the “30 Days” Memes Effectively to Maximize Submissive Growth

How to Use the “30 Days” Memes Effectively to Maximize Submissive Growth

From the Submissive Guide Newsletter 12-17-11 We’ve all seen them on other people’s blogs. You may have even done them as a way to prompt yourself with something to write. They are fun. They are memes. Memes are the quizzes, questions, and games that seem to spread like a virus all over the blogging scene [...]

5 comments Posted by lunaKM | Posted in: Newsletter Archive, Personal Growth
The Secret of Communicating When You Are Shy

The Secret of Communicating When You Are Shy

From the Submissive Guide Newsletter 9-17-11 Open communication is complicated by shyness. Addressing that shyness could help you open up to your partner and others instead of the social discomfort you constantly feel. But what is shyness and how does it manifest? You can get over being shy and start living your life free from [...]

Faith – A Personal Journey with Blyss

Faith – A Personal Journey with Blyss

From the soul of Charmed Blyss I thought I would come up with some snazzy title, or something with more zing than ‘Faith’, but life has moved me to the point where I desire to keep it simple and to the point, with a splash of creative Blyssism. For just over a year now, life [...]

3 comments Posted by charmed blyss | Posted in: Personal Growth
The Importance of Taking Your Time Exploring Submission Before Starting a Relationship

The Importance of Taking Your Time Exploring Submission Before Starting a Relationship

One thing I have learned from my experience as a submissive and my encounters with submissives and slaves all over the place has been the importance of taking things slowly. At one time or another we all tend to rashly jump into a D/s relationship without really knowing the Dominant that we are surrendering to. [...]

2 comments Posted by lunaKM | Posted in: Beginner Basics, Personal Growth
What a Pain: Does Pain Tolerance Change Over Time?

What a Pain: Does Pain Tolerance Change Over Time?

A question I was recently asked : “how has you pain tolerance been affected [sic]sense you began BDSM? Also when you first met grimly, if he were to put you through a session like the ones you can stand now, how much would your pain and pleasure be different than now? I’m curious cuz I’m [...]

5 comments Posted by thisgirl | Posted in: Play and Sex
Why I Used to Believe I Could Never Be a Slave

Why I Used to Believe I Could Never Be a Slave

Within weeks of the realization that I wanted to be more than a kinky bed partner I made the personal definitions of submissive and slave. Since then, over 7 years ago they have changed only slightly. So little that I had decided that based on my definitions I could never and would never be a [...]

11 comments Posted by lunaKM | Posted in: Beginner Basics, Personal Growth
Know Thyself, Don’t Rush Into a Relationship Until You Know These Six Things

Know Thyself, Don’t Rush Into a Relationship Until You Know These Six Things

From the Submissive Guide Newsletter 3/19/11 The excitement of a new D/s relationship is often the first thing that a novice submissive seeks. How else are they going to learn about play, and submission than in a relationship, they might reason. There is a better, more prepared way than jumping into a relationship with someone [...]

3 comments Posted by lunaKM | Posted in: Newsletter Archive, Personal Growth
Learning Good Observation Skills for Better Submissive Awareness

Learning Good Observation Skills for Better Submissive Awareness

From the Submissive Guide Newsletter 3-5-11 Over 6 years ago now, my perceptions of what a submissive was were still very shallow and incomplete. I believed that being submissive as a passive personality trait and it didn’t require a lot of ‘work’ on my part. Almost encouraging the laziness I had fostered in my marriage. [...]

1 comment Posted by lunaKM | Posted in: Newsletter Archive, Talents and Skills
The Bare Necessities of a Total Power Exchange Relationship

The Bare Necessities of a Total Power Exchange Relationship

A friend asked me the other day what was necessary in a D/s or TPE relationship in order to make it fulfilling for me. It was quite an interesting question and one I’d like to answer here. First things first; a TPE or Total Power Exchange is where the submissive has surrendered all control to [...]

2 comments Posted by lunaKM | Posted in: Beginner Basics
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