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Articles for tag 'compromise'

Articles

Afraid of Not Being Me Anymore: Transformation Without Fear

Afraid of Not Being Me Anymore: Transformation Without Fear

Becoming submissive does not mean you stop being who you are now. All of my advice has always been that you should be you, just a better you.

1 comment Posted by lunaKM | Posted in: Newsletter Archive, Personal Growth
Balancing D/s: Needing Permission to Go Out With Family

Balancing D/s: Needing Permission to Go Out With Family

Some advice on balancing a d/s relationship and family.

Leave a comment Posted by Kayla Lords | Posted in: Ask Anything
Transitioning From Monogamy to Ethical Non-Monogamy

Transitioning From Monogamy to Ethical Non-Monogamy

This is written as a bode of encouragement to those who are struggling in moving from a monogamous relationship to a non-monogamous one.

2 comments Posted by Mrs. Darling | Posted in: Relationships
Sexual Compromise: When You’re Only A Little Horny

Sexual Compromise: When You’re Only A Little Horny

Sometimes I want to be horny, or I am physically horny but my mind isn’t into it. In these situations, I have to find a workaround to get myself where I personally want to be.

Leave a comment Posted by andyiccee | Posted in: Play and Sex

Why Your Sexual Needs Matter in a D/s Relationship (or ANY Relationship)

Other than fulfilling pleasure, your sexual needs are just as important as any other needs you have in a relationship; from love or happiness, trust and honesty, being taken care of or anything else you’ve determined is a need for you in a relationship.

Image courtesy of Sira Anamwong / FreeDigitalPhotos.net

When Needs Change: How Communication Worked When My Partner Didn’t Want to Be Dominant Anymore

Through open communication and the ability to listen to one another, we were able to come to a conclusion that met both of our needs.

1 comment Posted by andyiccee | Posted in: Beginner Basics, Relationships
Communicating While Submissive

Communicating While Submissive

This is a guest post by Xiao Yingtai. Doms keep telling us that they’re not mind-readers, so we have to communicate. But it’s hard! Especially when it’s something they might not want to hear. The good news is that there is always a submissive way to say it. And you never have to compromise the message. Here is [...]

Leave a comment Posted by Guest Author | Posted in: Beginner Basics, Personal Growth
Calling Him Sir Should Mean Something, Right?

Calling Him Sir Should Mean Something, Right?

I have been in a D/s relationship for eight months, but he has a problem with moving forward, asking three things of me. Kneeling when he comes in, being naked, and calling him Sir, calling him Sir, I have a hard time doing all the time. I feel that I want to know how he [...]

5 comments Posted by lunaKM | Posted in: Ask Anything
How Do I Know If I Can I Make it In This Lifestyle?

How Do I Know If I Can I Make it In This Lifestyle?

I was curious about bdsm before I knew what it was. I knew I liked being spanked, being told what to do, etc. I started looking into bdsm but haven’t mentioned it to my boyfriend of 3.5 years because I’m afraid he’ll think I’m a weird, for lack of a better word. Although he knows [...]

Leave a comment Posted by lunaKM | Posted in: Ask Anything, Beginner Basics
You Can Not Make Someone Be a Dominant

You Can Not Make Someone Be a Dominant

I’ve written on the site about how you can work with the partner you have to bring out their Dominance or feel submissive in a subtle way and because of that I have received a lot of messages of frustrated people trying to make their partner dominate them. The scenario seems to be the same, [...]

Leave a comment Posted by lunaKM | Posted in: Relationships

Dolly Learns To Balance Kink and Everyday Life

This is a guest post by Dolly. My wanderings into BDSM and Dom/sub space started a few years ago with my partner, initially as a within-bedroom-limits play. In a whirlwind of exploration, delicious pain, laughter and the most deviant of confessions, we now find ourselves in a 24/7 Dom/sub relationship. As rewarding, grounding and indulgent [...]

Leave a comment Posted by Guest Author | Posted in: Beginner Basics, Relationships
Do You Make These Mistakes? Avoid Outing a Fellow BDSM Lifestyler

Do You Make These Mistakes? Avoid Outing a Fellow BDSM Lifestyler

There are a few “sins” in the world of BDSM; ignoring a safe word and touching that which does not belong to you are a few examples.  But, while both of these are bad, one might be able to look at a different point of view.  Someone may ignore a safe word because their scene [...]

1 comment Posted by LaneyDoll | Posted in: Community
Male Submission – Selfishness

Male Submission – Selfishness

The title of this article may seem self-contradictory but submission means different things to different people and also almost all human beings are selfish to at least some degree at some point in our lives. Many submissives gain pleasure directly from the pleasure of their dominant and they are clearly not the target of this [...]

18 comments Posted by ted_subby | Posted in: Male Submission
The Ready-Made Submissive

The Ready-Made Submissive

The Ready-Made Submissive. This is a phenomenon that I am seeing pop up around the BDSM community. Why is this becoming prevalent? What exactly is a ready-made submissive? How can we, as a submissive, not fall into the pitfall of this? This is what I am going to talk about, and, hopefully, help you to [...]

2 comments Posted by LadySneak | Posted in: Beginner Basics
Struggling to Find Balance in a Stressful Life

Struggling to Find Balance in a Stressful Life

Sometimes it is difficult to find balance when there is so much going on in your life. It is important, however, to find some compromise within yourself because otherwise you may become stressed out. No one wants to be stressed out if they can help it. I know I don’t like that feeling. Balance can [...]

5 comments Posted by LadySneak | Posted in: Beginner Basics
Initiating a Discussion About BDSM Interest with a Vanilla Partner: Part 3- My Partner is Interested!

Initiating a Discussion About BDSM Interest with a Vanilla Partner: Part 3- My Partner is Interested!

In part 1 of this series of articles we examined the initial approach for discussing your submissive desires with your vanilla partner. In  part 2 we examined how to address the issue if your partner does not respond positively to the initial approach. In this final part 3 we examine how to proceed if your vanilla [...]

3 comments Posted by ted_subby | Posted in: Relationships
Trust is a Five Letter Word

Trust is a Five Letter Word

from the Submissive Guide Newsletter 1/7/12 If you ask someone what the foundation of any relationship is they are likely to say one of three things. They are likely to say communication, compromise and trust. Today I’m going to talk about trust. The word is thrown around a lot but many submissives I talk to [...]

1 comment Posted by lunaKM | Posted in: Newsletter Archive, Relationships
5 Ways to Resolve Conflict in a D/s Relationship

5 Ways to Resolve Conflict in a D/s Relationship

Last month I had a question show up in my inbox that actually had me puzzled for a bit. Not that the question was difficult at all, but that I honestly didn’t think about how I handle it in our relationship, so I got up and asked KM. He assured me that my thought process [...]

4 comments Posted by lunaKM | Posted in: Relationships
What Makes a Good Dominant?

What Makes a Good Dominant?

I’d commented on a thread recently on the topic of what makes a good dominant here on fetlife and I’ve been thinking about it a little more since as I have had personal experience of both good and bad doms first hand and from stories and the experiences of friends also. Of course not everyone [...]

5 comments Posted by thisgirl | Posted in: Beginner Basics

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