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Articles for tag 'communication'

Articles

Play Nice: Some Notes on Scene  Etiquette and Leather Protocol (Part 1 of 7) – General Principles

Play Nice: Some Notes on Scene Etiquette and Leather Protocol (Part 1 of 7) – General Principles

from the Submissive Guide Newsletter 10-9-16 by Ambrosio. This was first published on Ambrosio’s site and has a free to distribute license. Abrosio dedicated this article to Beverly M. in Austin. Good Manners vs. Correct Protocol “Manners are of more importance than laws. Manners are what vex or soothe, corrupt or purify, exalt or debase, [...]

Leave a comment Posted by Guest Author | Posted in: Community, Newsletter Archive
When Journaling Gets Hard – How Depression Affected Our D/s Dynamic and How My Journal Helped Bring Us Back Together

When Journaling Gets Hard – How Depression Affected Our D/s Dynamic and How My Journal Helped Bring Us Back Together

This is a guest post by Elle. I was inspired to write this article by the recent series  about submissive journalling. I found myself wanting to get back into journaling, yet still holding back. This is a personal account of what can happen when journalling goes wrong. In my case, it was when I became [...]

2 comments Posted by Guest Author | Posted in: Personal Growth
Must I Always Wait for My Dominant to Tell me What to Do?

Must I Always Wait for My Dominant to Tell me What to Do?

from the Submissive Guide Newsletter 9-10-16 The topic for this article came to me from a reader survey I did over a year ago where I asked you what was most pressing to your at that moment and this question, “must I always wait for my Dom to tell me what to do?” came up. [...]

1 comment Posted by lunaKM | Posted in: Beginner Basics, Newsletter Archive
The Importance of Being Authentic

The Importance of Being Authentic

I haven’t really written much lately. It’s been a part lack of motivation and part lack of inspiration. I’ve had a few ideas, but nothing that really convinced me that I need to actually put down any words. But then the Universe hit me with a really big stick. A couple of months ago, I [...]

Leave a comment Posted by tequilarose | Posted in: Mindset, Relationships

Hitting the Wall During Play – Limit’s Edge

This is a guest post by Mistress Steel. It was part of her Steel’s Chamber Scrolls which is now defunct. Shared with Permission. The Wall: The Wall is one identification of the limit that the mind and body are physically capable of processing. Some submissives will talk about ‘hitting the Wall’ or ‘White Out’. This is [...]

Leave a comment Posted by Guest Author | Posted in: Play and Sex, Safety
31 Days of Submissive Journaling – Day 6: Why New Submissives Should Write a Submissive Journal

31 Days of Submissive Journaling – Day 6: Why New Submissives Should Write a Submissive Journal

In the first few posts about submissive journals you’ve read about the kind of tool a journal is in a relationship, whether that be a new one or a long standing one, as well as how Dominants use your journal as a tool for communication and relationship building but what about when you are single, [...]

Ask Submissive Guide: Getting Angry Over Punishment

Ask Submissive Guide: Getting Angry Over Punishment

Hello, I have a question. I’m having a hard time getting past just being angry when my Dom punishes me. Specifically corporal punishment. I understand what I do wrong but it is so hard to just lay there and take it as they say. I don’t want to start a conflict with Sir, I just [...]

3 comments Posted by Mrs. Darling | Posted in: Ask Anything, BDSM Fundamentals
31 Days of Submissive Journaling – Day 5: What Your Dominant Learns from Your Journal

31 Days of Submissive Journaling – Day 5: What Your Dominant Learns from Your Journal

Writing a journal is often a personal choice, but within a D/s dynamic, it can often be a task given from the Dominant to help with communication and understanding the submissive. Often we can get so wrapped up in ourselves and we can forget that a journal is a powerful tool that the Dominant has. Now, [...]

Ask Submissive Guide: New to D/s and LDR

Ask Submissive Guide: New to D/s and LDR

Dear SG, Me and my boyfriend have been talking about this. He’s convincing me into it. We haven’t experienced anything yet. I’m new at this, he’s a dominant. But he’s leaving for 9 months deployment and I don’t know how to do this long distance relationship. Sincerely,New to D/s Dear New to D/s, I’m sorry [...]

8 comments Posted by Kayla Lords | Posted in: Ask Anything
Ask Submissive Guide: Trying to Make a Poly Relationship Work

Ask Submissive Guide: Trying to Make a Poly Relationship Work

Dear Submissive Guide, My Dom and I are basically in a LDR. We have been together for about 8 months. His job requirements are such that he travels consistently. In our relationship he identified as poly and I have great interest as well. We decided that it would be in our best interest to become [...]

1 comment Posted by Kayla Lords | Posted in: Ask Anything
The Art of Apology: Knowing When to Apologize

The Art of Apology: Knowing When to Apologize

This is part two of The Art of Apology. Would you like to read the previous article first? More often than not, we know the moment that we say or do something that our words and actions are going to merit an apology to someone. Most of us have that voice inside our heads that [...]

Leave a comment Posted by kallista | Posted in: Beginner Basics
Simply Service e-Zine: May 2005

Simply Service e-Zine: May 2005

It’s time for another Simply Service newsletter. This one has some interesting communication articles and one really good one on leather care. Check it out! From the newsletter’s description; Current contributors are all slave or submissive identified, and in real time relationships where obedience and service are necessary, valued skills, achieved over time. I have been fortunate enough to [...]

Leave a comment Posted by lunaKM | Posted in: Service
The Art of Apology: The Importance of Apologizing

The Art of Apology: The Importance of Apologizing

We all know that communicating well with our partners is one of the most important (and often hardest) aspects of keeping a relationship healthy. It’s something that’s talked about a lot in the BDSM community when we talk about meeting our wants and needs, as well as in the vanilla community where we address building [...]

Leave a comment Posted by kallista | Posted in: Beginner Basics
How Often Have You Said: “I Don’t Know What’s Expected of Me, But I’d Like To”?

How Often Have You Said: “I Don’t Know What’s Expected of Me, But I’d Like To”?

from the Submissive Guide Newsletter 8/29/15 What ARE you expected to do and know as a submissive? Well, for many who are just starting out, the answer really is not much. But that’s not the kind of answer you accept out of me, right? There’s more to it, isn’t there? Of course there always is, [...]

Why SSC and RACK Are Both Important Safety Acronyms to Know

Why SSC and RACK Are Both Important Safety Acronyms to Know

One of the biggest challenges that we face in the kinky community is the acceptance of kinks which do not align with our own. A group of individuals can bond over a shared desire to bend over someone over their knees and give him a good spanking, but introduce into that group an individual who [...]

1 comment Posted by kallista | Posted in: Beginner Basics
Safewords Are Not “Safe Words”

Safewords Are Not “Safe Words”

When we talk about safety we can’t avoid talking about safewords. Do you have a safeword? Do you feel safe having it? Need to go back and learn about safewords first? You can do so here. We’ve developed a false sense of security around the “magic” of safewords. But let me tell you this: it [...]

1 comment Posted by lunaKM | Posted in: Beginner Basics
Power Exchange While in Addiction Recovery

Power Exchange While in Addiction Recovery

As the holiday is upon us once more, I wanted to share some common feels with others who struggle with recovery. Recovery from anything: drink, drugs, eating disorders, self-harm, etc. If you are or are with somebody who considers themselves “in recovery,” this is for you. Now I only have the perspective of (using Male/female D/s [...]

3 comments Posted by Mrs. Darling | Posted in: Beginner Basics
Keep Your Voice: Your Rights as a Submissive

Keep Your Voice: Your Rights as a Submissive

With franchises like Fifty Shades of Grey having integrated themselves almost completely in the mainstream, I have had the combined frustration and horror of my role as a submissive and my role as a teacher nearly clashing more than once. While I would NEVER share any part of my home activities with any of my [...]

10 comments Posted by kallista | Posted in: Personal Growth
Opening Communication with Myself

Opening Communication with Myself

In every single article I write, I stress the importance of communication, so you would think that I practice as I preach and work really hard to include communication in my relationship. And truth is, I do try, but I have realized that open and honest communication with a partner can only happen when I [...]

3 comments Posted by andyiccee | Posted in: Beginner Basics
How to Ask for What You Need as a Submissive

How to Ask for What You Need as a Submissive

There’s a really bad idea out there that Dominants decide everything and submissives simply accept it. Once you enter into your relationship, after initial negotiations, you’re expected to submit, serve, and wait for whatever your Dominant decides to do to you or for you. You do what you’re told and keep your mouth shut. Wrong! [...]

10 comments Posted by Kayla Lords | Posted in: Relationships
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