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Articles for tag 'aftercare'

Articles

6 Important Activities to Include in Your Aftercare Routine

6 Important Activities to Include in Your Aftercare Routine

One of the things that I think many practiced people of the BDSM community pride themselves on is their ability to positively follow up sex. We like to throw around the word “after care” like it’s vernacular rather than jargon—the way that we also generally assume having a first aid kit with a pair of [...]

Leave a comment Posted by kallista | Posted in: Play and Sex
31 Days of Submissive Journaling: Day 24 – Scene Reports: How they can Empower Your Playtime

31 Days of Submissive Journaling: Day 24 – Scene Reports: How they can Empower Your Playtime

Today I want to talk about scene reports: what they are, how to begin writing them, and most importantly, how they can aid and empower your playtime. I have only had one scene go really bad with my Master. In all of our years of playing, in all of the trials and errors, in all [...]

Simply Service e-Zine: July 2005

Simply Service e-Zine: July 2005

I hope you are enjoying this look back on this wonderful resource. I know I am.  Remember, much of the content of these newsletters is still relevant today so take some time to read it! From the newsletter’s description; Current contributors are all slave or submissive identified, and in real time relationships where obedience and service are necessary, valued [...]

Leave a comment Posted by lunaKM | Posted in: Service
What is Aftercare?

What is Aftercare?

This is a guest post by Mistress Steel. It was part of her Steel’s Chamber Scrolls which is now defunct. Shared with Permission. Affectionate care and attention following any type of traumatic or mentally challenging event. D/s relationships are engaged with a passion and intensity that are often so strong that they can strip away at [...]

1 comment Posted by Guest Author | Posted in: BDSM Fundamentals
Recognizing Sub Rebound (Sub Drop)

Recognizing Sub Rebound (Sub Drop)

This is a guest post by Mistress Steel. It was part of her Steel’s Chamber Scrolls which is now defunct. Shared with Permission. Submissive Rebound is a reaction that occurs in most submissives at some point in their relationship with a Dominant. It manifests in feelings of depression, heightened anxiety and a sensation of ‘distance’ between [...]

Leave a comment Posted by Guest Author | Posted in: Beginner Basics
What Happens After You Use Your Safeword?

What Happens After You Use Your Safeword?

You have a safeword for your BDSM kinky fun. Right? I know there’s a debate in the world of BDSM and D/s between the safeword crew and those who don’t want one. I land firmly on the side of having a safeword – always. It’s rarely used but it’s always there. We could debate the [...]

12 comments Posted by Kayla Lords | Posted in: Play and Sex, Safety
Ask lunaKM – How Can I Manage Sub Drop in a Long Distance Relationship?

Ask lunaKM – How Can I Manage Sub Drop in a Long Distance Relationship?

I’m sure you have addressed this… But would you be willing to give some advice on sub drop in long distance relationships? I have been with my Dom 7 months and he is wonderful, amazing, and perfect at after care, but there still is the emotional sub drop after play. Thank you for any advice you can [...]

2 comments Posted by lunaKM | Posted in: Beginner Basics
Ask lunaKM- How to Ask for More Aftercare

Ask lunaKM- How to Ask for More Aftercare

I have experienced sub drop for the first time. I’ve felt down after play but never like this. My dom and I met on Fetlife, and I am his second sub- the other is his best friend.  We all get on really well, and he is super attentive, but I still worry about being an [...]

2 comments Posted by lunaKM | Posted in: Ask Anything, Beginner Basics, Safety
Sub Drop Madness – Submissive Meditation Monday

Sub Drop Madness – Submissive Meditation Monday

I’m devoting this Monday to meditation, reflection and devotion to submission. I hope to select topics that will get you thinking differently about some part of your life or submission and then just maybe grow a little bit further. If you have ideas for topics that might work for a Meditation Monday, please email me. With [...]

1 comment Posted by lunaKM | Posted in: Beginner Basics, Play and Sex
CC 2.0 Photo by Glang Bul

Feeling Down After a Play Session? You Could Have Sub Drop

One weekend, my Dominant and I had a number of really great scenes. No matter what we were doing, we were deeply connected to each other and it was blissful. I can’t even remember what we did but I remember the high I felt I was soaring on no matter what else we were doing [...]

8 comments Posted by moonlight | Posted in: Play and Sex

How to Care for Bruises and More BDSM Play Recovery Tips

If there’s one topic that comes up time and again on this blog, in readers’ emails to me and online forums is how do you care for bruises and other physical and emotional reminders of play? Since 2009 when I started writing this site I’ve returned to this topic time and again with interesting and [...]

Leave a comment Posted by lunaKM | Posted in: Play and Sex
The Anatomy of A BDSM Scene: What Happens?

The Anatomy of A BDSM Scene: What Happens?

Your first scene with your Dominant is coming up and so far they’ve been pretty foggy as far as what will happen. You’ve never been involved in BDSM before but you are excited and scared for the upcoming session. What’s going to happen? What will you expect to see and do? A scene is in [...]

Leave a comment Posted by lunaKM | Posted in: Play and Sex

Chat Night Transcript – Dominant Aftercare

from the Submissive Guide Chat held 7/09/13 on Aftercare for Dominants [20:10] <~lunaKM> Hello and welcome to another chat night here on Submissive Guide. Please feel free to talk about the subject whenever a thought comes to mind, this is not a moderated talk and you do not have to ask permission to speak or [...]

Leave a comment Posted by lunaKM | Posted in: Roundtable Discussions
You Could Be in Danger While in Top/Sub Space – Learn How to Protect Yourself

You Could Be in Danger While in Top/Sub Space – Learn How to Protect Yourself

I first published this in Society of Janus’ Bi-monthly newsletter, I thought I’d share it with you as well. From the Submissive Guide Newsletter 4/6/13 Exploring kink is full of exciting experiences and hormonal roller coasters. We manipulate adrenaline and endorphins to give us a pleasurable experience during play. Often without knowing how these hormones [...]

Leave a comment Posted by lunaKM | Posted in: Newsletter Archive, Play and Sex

After the Scene is Over – Clean-up, Aftercare, and Check-Ins

You scene has just ended and you both feel spent, exhausted and buzzing with good feelings. And then you look around the room, move your aching limbs and start to come out of your or play-induced fog. The room is a mess, there are toys everywhere. Both of you need aftercare. Who does what? How [...]

Leave a comment Posted by lunaKM | Posted in: Play and Sex, Safety
Some of the Best Kept Secrets to Sub Drop Recovery

Some of the Best Kept Secrets to Sub Drop Recovery

Sub drop. Declared among submissives as a horrible affliction and the bane of  play and relationships. We try to understand what it happening when it starts to bring us down and if we don’t know what it is can scare us into never playing again. It’s true; sub drop can be bad. For those of [...]

3 comments Posted by lunaKM | Posted in: Play and Sex
Your Responsibilities in Play – In and Out of a Relationship

Your Responsibilities in Play – In and Out of a Relationship

From the Submissive Guide Newsletter 3/2/13 Our responsibilities as a submissive are important to be aware of. I’ve said a number of times in other articles that often novice submissives feel that once they are in a relationship they don’t have any responsibilities at all. That is far from true. Does that then mean that [...]

1 comment Posted by lunaKM | Posted in: Newsletter Archive, Play and Sex

What is a Scene?

This post is part of an effort to provide a glossary for novice submissives of words commonly seen across this site and in the BDSM community. A very commonplace word in BDSM discussions is the word ‘scene’ but rarely do we define what that is with novices. Also, experienced people take for granted some of [...]

3 comments Posted by lunaKM | Posted in: BDSM Glossary
What To Do When You Encounter Limits Mid Scene

What To Do When You Encounter Limits Mid Scene

Imagine this; you are playing and happily enjoying what is going on between the two of you. As the scene continues you start to feel pushed to your limit, but you continue to play. Then, almost without warning you hit a wall and (hopefully) safeword. You’ve just hit a limit. It could be a temporary [...]

3 comments Posted by lunaKM | Posted in: Play and Sex

In Readiness – Scene Care and Aftercare

Whether you are preparing for a scene or well into aftercare it’s always handy to have tools and resources at hand that can help you through all the stages of the play time many of us adore. I’ve gathered a list of the articles and essays on this site that are related to scene care [...]

Leave a comment Posted by lunaKM | Posted in: Play and Sex
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