Yes, I had been in this lifestyle with the same Master going on six years now. I had just find out where he works, phone number etc. But I have not met anyone in his family or his friends. I am kept a secret and he is separated from his wife. He said to me that he wants to tell her about is but he does not want to hurt her. Then he told me he would introduce me to his son etc but he does not how to go about introducing me as.

Just wondering if this is normal or am I being used? He told me that he is my Master forever but I am not happy about this. I had talked to him about it but he told me not to be so concern about it. I would like to know anyone input about this please :) - A Secret

Dear A Secret,

In just your short message I found so many issues that, being an outsider to your story, would cause me to run to the hills. You've been with someone for six years and just now finding out where he works and his phone number? You haven't met any of his friends and family and he says he's separated from his wife? I don't buy it. If they are separated, that usually means leading to divorce and "not wanting to hurt her" is a disguise of "I'm really still with her and feeding you with lies so you'll stay with me too." How would he introduce you to his son? "Hi son, this is my mistress. I'm cheating on your mother with her." Of course, he's not going to say that. You will never be introduced to his family or friends because you are intentionally a secret love.

You are a secret because he hasn't broken up with his wife and if his secret is found out he loses both of his lives, the one with his wife and the one with you.  That's what I see when I read your request for advice. Could I be wrong? I guess I could, but who would keep the one you are supposed to love a secret from everyone and keep basic information from your partner too? Only a liar and a cheat.

I'm sorry but I think he's playing you. You indicated that you aren't happy being a secret. It's time you stand up and tell him that you need to stop being a secret and having secrets kept from you. After six years it's time for cold hard truths. If he won't do it, no matter the reason, I feel it's time to move on and find someone who will love to share his life with you and make you an important part of his life, not just the hidden part.

How do you feel about it? Do you like the idea of being his secret? Something has kept you with him for over six years, what is it? Is it worth the unhappiness you currently feel?

Personal Disclaimer: It's not a secret that I find cheating abhorrent and despicable and it likely comes out in this post. There is no valid reason to be in a secret relationship, in my opinion. I make no apology for my views in this matter. I will not help you maintain a secret relationship but advise you seek a way out. Lying isn't one sided. If they lie to their partner, they will lie to you. How is a trusting D/s relationship, or any relationship, going to work based on lies?