Mentoring, self-help and submissive exploration

lunaKM a full-time slave in an M/s relationship. She is the founder and editor of Submissive Guide. Learn more about her here and connect with her on lunaKM.me, Twitter, Google+, FetLife.

4 responses to “How to Turn Your Submissive Experience Into Education for Your Dominant”

  1. Sepianova

    This article is so timely for me right now. I’ve recently begun a relationship with a novice dominant, and I’ve struggled with the feeling that me showing him what I know is somehow un-submissive, or that my taking the lead is setting a bad trend that we won’t be able to get out of.

    Thankfully he’s helped me to see the flaws in that logic, and his dominance has just springboarded from the foundation I was able to help give him with my insight. Our relationship is coming along in leaps and bounds, something that might never have happened if I’d chosen to stay silent.

  2. darkstar

    I also recently started dating a man that is in the learning stages of being my Dom. He is open to learning in his role and I knew right away he was a visual learner (so am I), so I will show him.
    Sometimes it may be difficult since it is long distance, but we will see each other often enough for us to learn together.

  3. Synn Tryst

    This was a very helpful article. Thank you for posting it. I can see where it is ok of me as a slave to impart information to my Master.
    I had never thought to use smaller chunks of information as a way to introduce new things or elements into our dynamic. This article so much sense on so many levels.Thanks again.

  4. luckystarr

    I’ve recently been involved in teaching my novice Dominant. At first I was worried that was ‘topping from the bottom’, but my Dominant helped me to see this was not the case. I share what I have learned over the years and am continuing to learn. I share informative articles with him, as long as they are presented in paragraph format…he hates anything presented in a huge wall of straight text with no paragraphing. We are currently long distance, and have yet to meet face to face. That step is coming this summer. I look forward to the opportunity to teach him more one on one. He already has grown in leaps and bounds from what I have shared with him so far.

    I think as long as the Dominant is open minded enough to learn what the submissive can, wants, or needs to teach, and if both the submissive and the Dominant approach it in a way that works best for them, then the submissive in a teaching role can be a very positive thing for a D/s dynamic.

    I’m a strong believer in that there is no one right way to approach this lifestyle, so while a teaching dynamic might not be for everyone, it is certainly beneficial to those who are open to it.

    I’m lucky enough to have a Dominant that wants to learn, and who acknowledges that I have a wellspring of information that he can draw from in his journey. And why wouldn’t I want to help my Dominant to grow in his role? And I think taking this journey together is a way we can deepen the bond we already share.

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