For the Submissive Guide Newsletter 11/3/12
The many lessons in life can be picked up in some of the most unusual places. The other day I was watching my cats and had a sudden realization that they way they live could have lessons for me and my submission if I wanted to see them. The truth is that you can pick up lessons everywhere you look if you want to. Most people put up blinders to the world though and unless it enters their bubble they don’t see it.
Let’s look into my cats’ world and see if there are things we can pick up about life and submission.
(If you can’t tell, this is meant to be a fun essay.)
Everything I Know About Submission I Learned from my Cats
When things are stressful stop and care for yourself often.
My cats, Zeus and Maximus, are constantly preening themselves. I can’t count the numerous times I’ve seen them on a mission somewhere and then stop and preen a bit before continuing. If you learn that everyday life requires that we take good care of ourselves and that no matter the stress our lives take we should stop and breathe for a few moments before continuing. Enjoy your showers, spoil yourself, care about your body, mind and soul and it will show. You may even feel less stress if you stopped more often to think about yourself and what you need.
Eat your fill before walking away from the table.
Zeus doesn’t like to graze. He will sit and eat as much as he can before walking away from the food bowl. I took this one to mean that you need to finish what you start before moving on to something else. Also, avoid muli-tasking whenever possible. We often forget that the things we do require our attention, oftentimes our full attention. Talking on the phone all the time is one of those things that irritates me constantly. What could you possibly have to say that is more important than paying attention to the road? Or ignoring the customer service personnel? Or eating in a restaurant? Start applying your full attention to one task at a time and the world will seem less of a hurried place.
Take it easy on yourself, nap frequently.
None of us gets enough sleep. Sleep may seem like a waste of time, but your body requires sleep to function well when you are awake. We all learn this, and our body is great at reminding us all day if we haven’t gotten enough. Learn to take naps if you need it, turn off the television earlier and go to bed. Lack of sleep has many health detriments like depression, decreased energy during the day, difficulty concentrating and focusing and rapid aging. So do your body good and take a nap.
When you need attention don’t just beg for it, crawl up and purr in their ear.
Some of us live on human interaction. If you have a Dominant but want some play time or affection, just asking for it might not be enough. Take action and do something about it. Curl up next to them, sit at their feet or bring them your favorite toy and ask them to use it. A relationship is two people and being submissive does not mean you just wait for something fun to happen, you can make it happen too.
Provide warmth and comfort when lonely.
I know that as a slave one of my duties is to provide comfort and service when my Owner needs it. This can be a relaxing foot massage at the end of the day to a cold beer and a good movie. Making sure I am available to provide for him is important to me and should be important to many submissives. Even if service isn’t in your blood, being there for people not only makes them feel loved, it makes you feel loved in return.
Be independent but remind them you are still there at every opportunity.
As submissives, we often forget that we have responsibilities to attend to that go beyond waiting hand and foot on our Dominants. Continue to go about your tasks, but place little reminders of your submission around you and your Dominant. These reminders serve both of you in different ways. For you, it keeps you humming along in your submissive mindspace and for them it reminds them that you are there and available for whatever they need.
Play frequently and spontaneously.
Scenes and play time do not have to be planned, drawn out, long or involving. BDSM has quickies too. Also, don’t take life seriously all the time. Enjoy your free time, do things that make you feel good. Play games, visit with friends, learn something new. Life is too short to be constantly working.
Be daring, jump and hope to land upright.
Finally, don’t be afraid to try something new. Submission is full of rewarding activities. Trying them and failing still teaches you something about yourself than having never tried them in the first place. Venture into the community, meet new people, check out a play party or event. Explore what your new world has to offer you. Enjoy the journey.
I hope you enjoyed this fun post. What bits of advice have you learned from your animals that you can take into life or submission?
My name is lunaKM and I’m a full-time stay-at-home submissive in a D/s relationship.
I started blogging when I was exploring D/s online in 2003. I needed advice, mentors and helping hands. Since then I've made it my mission to help novice submissives understand themselves and the services they wish to provide. 
Love this post. Such good advise. Thank you!!!
Growing up I learned a lot about dominance and submission from our horses and dogs, animals don’t hold back with each other like people do and they don’t wait until the other’s backs are turned so they can misbehave. They just are who they are and they are accepted as such by all in their herd, pack, pride, etc. Its a beautiful way to live and I have really taken that to heart as I’ve gotten older.
Another lesson I’ve learned is one that you pointed out: Crawl up into His lap and purr in His ear. Works almost every time, whatever kind of mood He’s in.