i found you, Luna, by internet search and may i say that you are, to me, a godsend. i have been "asked" by the One i hope will someday be my Master to read "Becoming A Slave". this book has presented a lot of problems for me in that now i am questioning slavery vs. bottoming. i believe i am a slave. the book also states that online M/s relationships are not real. i realize there are some serious limitations to online relationships of any kind, but this does not feel "fake" to me, and yes, i'd rather have a real time relationship ... but, it isn't my fault that i've fallen into the dominant arms of someone who happens to live 2000 miles from me, is it? lol what are your feelings about the book i mentioned, online M/s relationships, and what can i do to prove to Master that i am more than just a bottom?

Hi there,

I've not read Becoming a Slave by Jack Rinella. I have read a few of his other books so I understand the way he writes and his theory of the D/s relationship. He's been in the scene longer than the Internet has existed so you have to keep that in mind when you read his criticism of online power exchange. A lot of people don't understand how you can have a relationship with someone that you don't see. Only you can know if the relationship is working for you and providing everything you need. I've written about online submission and you can even download a free ebook about how to make the most of online submission.

I was an online only submissive before KM moved here. We were just as far apart as you are from your Dominant now. And look at where we are - it's been 8 years since he moved here and we've never looked back.

Does your Master think you are just a bottom? You didn't say exactly in your question that he was questioning that - only that you were. You don't have to prove anything other than to be who you are. However, I would have a conversation with him and ask him what he defines the difference between a bottom and a submissive/slave. He may have different ideas than you and it's best to be on the same page about the basics like definitions.

All the best,

lunaKM