Mentoring, self-help and submissive exploration

lunaKM has been a full-time slave in an M/s relationship for over 10 years. She is the founder and editor of Submissive Guide. Learn more about her here and connect with her on lunaKM.me, Twitter, Google+, FetLife.

5 responses to “Fainting, Headaches and Nausea: Facing Sudden Illness During Play/Scene Time”

  1. nan {SL}

    I have experienced both drops in blood pressure and drops in blood sugar when playing. I can only recommend being clear to the top/ Dom about these possible consequences before playing so S/He can look out for the symptoms. They are almost sure to come on if I’ve stood too long before playing, play in a too hot room, or have my arms suspended above my head too long. We now try to put my hands so that my arms are more straight to the elbow, and then the hands tied up. We bring extra lengths of chain and ties in order to extend the length. It is good to have a safe word like ‘yellow’ or ‘orange’ in case you start to feel too hot or nauseated (a sure sign I have to come down NOW!).

  2. Jen

    Today’s post reminded me of the subject and that I wanted to share that I haven’t seen talked about on the site; a topic that I don’t think gets well covered for submissives, especially novices.

    A few months ago, a more experienced sub asked me an interesting question. She said: ”A top and bottom are doing a scene. Bottom is bound nice and securely to the bed. Top is dinking around with implements…they’re having a good scene. No danger of cops showing up or anything like that. BDSM safety usually focuses on the dangers to the bottom… but in the scenario I’ve presented, what is the very real and lethal danger to the top in the room? A danger the bottom is not threatened by (so it’s not like the room is about to catch fire or something), but one which could very well cost the top their life?”

    I thought long and hard about my answer to this one; believe me, I was stumped for a little while. Two possibilities initially came to mind. First possibility is that something could go wrong, intended or not… restraints give way and the bottom falls, breaking something, malfunctioning equipment or improper use, or natural, unrelated ailment occurs… that leads the pair in the ER. Regardless of the injury or illness, the top is going to be held liable and arrested despite the bottom’s pleas that what they think is not what is happening.

    The second thing that came to mind is something that I seem to hear about quite often on the news is that when the bottom is angry at the top for whatever reason, they go running to the police saying that they’ve been abused or held captive, etc. Life as the top knows it is over…

    However, another, more subtle answer came to mind… I had read a series of articles on the site on sub-drop and self-care and the last article in the series about Dom-drop and aftercare really stuck with me. I, probably like many other subs, don’t think about the aftercare our Doms need, because, hell, we’re the ones bruised, humiliated, or whatever flavor we like, right? If the Doms aren’t properly tended to, helped to “come down” and reconnect after a session, that could slowly have a deteriorating effect on a Dom’s psyche; they need the aftercare as much as we do. When a Dom is no longer able to cope mentally, mistakes can be made, limits might be crossed, control is lost or psychoses such as depression or anxiety may set in- which only become worse because the Dom is resistive to letting on something is wrong.

    I was pretty proud of my answers, thinking I had nailed the response. But, alas, I was wrong. The real answer is what happens if our Dom falls ill? What happens if we’re restrained and S/He has a heart attack or something like that? Then what??? Here’s the lesson that we all should know if we don’t already: we need to have some sort of ”escape plan.” Sure many of us have our safe words to stop a scene, but do we have an emergency plan? My friend recommended that two things always be within a sub’s reach during a scene: a cell phone and a pair of strong scissors (she recommends the type that EMTs use). Seems simple enough, doesn’t it? Better to be safe than sorry, in my opinion.

    Anyone else have any thoughts about this???

    dk

  3. bonimiss

    @dragonskitten .. very interesting predicament. Scissors and a cell phone would not help me in most situations since I would be bound very tightly. I will never escape. Plus I am usually gagged. I don’t know if there would be a way out of this problem except to wait for search parties.

    I have fallen ill during play sessions. I felt nauseous and really thought I would throw up. I tend to eat small amounts when we play and if I eat to much, this happens. And yes heat compounds the problem. Damn those hot flashes.

  4. honeysenpai

    yea i sufferd from an asthma attack whilst in play because the position i was in my arms where wraped round myself (like in a straight jacket) and i was in doggy with my head down on the floor so now my master makes shur in in positions where my chest is open and its easy to breath

  5. Waterdeep

    During some really very not-intense play, I passed out. It was odd, because one moment i was standing, the next I was on the floor wondering why my Master was so upset. Apparently i came to the moment i met the floor. I felt fine.

    he helped me up, and I passed out again. I distinctly remember 9 instances of waking up, though I’m told it was more around 13. The last one being when I told the paramedics (don’t remember them being called or showing up) that I would be okay to walk to the ambulance. Woke up on a gurney thing.

    Massive dehydration. Dangerously high dehydration. I didnt pass out again once the paramedics got an IV thingie in me, and after a couple hours at the hospital, i actually was able to stand and walk without issue.

    So yeah. Passing out 13 times in a row taught me a pretty major lesson. I have not passed out even once since then. I just wish I could remember what happened to get me so dehydrated. But that entire day is a huge blur, for obvious reasons.

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