Q~Hi, I'm nineteen and in college, and I've never been in any sort of relationship. I've always been sort of attracted to aspects of bdsm, but I didn't fully realize it until the past couple years. I'm not sure how to feel about wanting this, when I haven't even been kissed and I'm still trying to find a boyfriend. Also, this desire I feel is strictly sexual. Meaning, I am extremely turned on by ideas of being extremely submissive in the bedroom, but outside I want respect, and to be more like a "normal" couple. Also, maybe not even all the time in the bedroom, just the majority of the time. Like, if we go backpacking, I just want to fuck in nature and that's it. I'm not sure what my question is, I guess just where does this land me? I feel like I just sound like some silly little girl.

A~Hi! You are not silly at all. You are exploring an unknown world, especially your own sexual side. There is nothing wrong with having sexual fantasies and they may not even include anything BDSM related. Now when it comes to finding people to explore this side with you, the kink community, in my opinion, is definitely the place to start as long as you put your safety first. As far as how much control you want to give to another person, that is completely up to you and you will need to be very stern with where you stand. I would suggest checking out www.Fetlife.com and look in your area for a munch and get a feel for the kinky community near you. Good luck and be safe.