This month I have a few new questions for you! As always, if you have questions you'd like answered then shoot me an email and I'll do my best to help you out!

If you find that you have another piece of advice to give that I may have overlooked please leave a comment. Your input is valuable!

when you don't know someones limit how do you know when they are saying no in a "yes" sense or if they really mean no stop? i would never want to intentionally hurt someone if they didn't want me to, yet i myself will make "no" noises and pull away at times, yet i don't want the person to stop. it's like it just feels so good i can't handle it. so how do you know when to stop? what is the limit? how do you read people? - From the Novices and Newbies Group on FetLife

I have a few posts here on the site that say one thing: safewords. A safeword would allow you to play until the bottom says stop and means it. It's especially important with brand new people to the scene to have a safeword until they are comfortable with playing and the sensations they are experiencing. Of course, the bottom isn't the only person who can say stop in a scene. If the Dominant has reached a level they are not comfortable continuing they can declare an end to the scene.

Each individual is going to have a different level and that means their pain threshold will be different so learning about your partner will help you be able to gauge when they are getting close to their limit. Outside influences can also impact a person's limits. If they are physically unhealthy or under stress the pain limit may be lower or higher.

Reading someone really comes from getting to know them and playing with them frequently. No one acts the same way or has the same behavior markers. I expect that you'll be practicing a lot more to see these small clues in your play partners in the future.

That's all I have for this month, if you want this series to continue I'm going to need you to open up and ask questions. Don't be afraid, I'll keep it anonymous.