Submissive Guide.com is doing wonderfully as a start up site and I hope that each and every one of you has learned and grown in your submission since you found this site and it’s associated resources. I’m just one person hoping to provide you with something you may not be able to find somewhere else.
A real person to answer your questions and get advice. I can’t do it without you. If you have questions or are in need of advice, please contact me at subguide@gmail.com or come to the site and submit your question via my contact form.
Even if you’d just like to suggest something for the website, I’m open to hearing what you’d like to see. The site is for you just as much as it is for me. Tell me what you want!
You aren’t alone. Your question could help many other submissives in the same situation as you are. I want to be there for you. Let me help you.
So send in those comments, questions, suggestions and requests for advice. Thank you.
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My name is lunaKM and I’m a full-time submissive in a D/s relationship. I am webslut to 
I have a question, or several.
I am a new submissive and I’m very confused by my dominants behavior. From the beginning of our interaction I have been very open about my need to have my dominant care about me. He tells me that my submission isn’t supposed to be conditional. I’m trying not to be conditional but I can’t seem to submit to him when he rejects my emotional needs. He’s pretty much given up on dominating me and says he doesn’t have time for me. (due to family and work issues) I am a plus size woman. I hate to think this is the real reason he’s rejecting me but I’m confused.
So it seems that either I’m not as submissive as he wants me to be. Or I am just not compatable with him.
I am a very new submissive. He is the one who brought it out of me and now has pretty much left me hanging. How can I better understand my submission without him dominating me the way I need him to?
I need a mentor, he says he doesn’t have time. Please help.
Kelly
Hi Kelly! I am a new sub too, but I can tell you already that you need to get yourself another dominant. He is crossing the line into emotional abuse. Bottom line is: If you aren’t happy, move on. I know, I had to leave my first Dom for a very similar reason. I had this vision that we could be together forever and I wanted to give myself over completely, but when he did not pay me the proper attention or respect (and yes, subs require both attention and respect), I knew I had to move on. And girl, I am plus size too and am having to turn the menfolk away. Don’t believe all that media bullshit about no man wanting you because your thighs jiggle. Rock your curves and hold your head up high. If you would like to speak to me privately, my email is lindsey_renee_smith@yahoo.com I think we could be great friends! Lindsey
Hi Kelly: I am also a plus size woman but have a Dom/Master who ensures my needs are met. It sounds to me like your Dom is not really a Dominant but someone who thought they may like it and try it out or a player.
Finding someone may take time and patience. Do not let someone like this man lower your self esteem or make you think you are less or deserve less. Know your needs and wants and make them a priority. Any Dom worth his salt will respect that whether or not you end up submitting to them. :)
Good luck in your search.
Where can i go to find sub drop information? best cures advice etc..
I’ve written about sub drop here on Submissive Guide. Typing your search into the site, you’ll get:
http://www.submissiveguide.com/2009/03/sub-drops-emotional-side/
http://www.submissiveguide.com/2009/01/caring-for-yourself-after-a-scene-self-aftercare/
http://www.submissiveguide.com/2009/09/chat-night-transcript-space-drop-talk/
You can also find a lot of information on the web:
http://www.google.com/search?q=sub+drop
I have a question too. I know this is kinda late for the post, but I am a a loss as to where I can find experienced advice on D/s relationships.
I have a Dom, and He loves me. But the things is, sometimes he act as my “boyfriend” then he acts as my Master. I am having trouble dealing with the fact that he wants that Master and sub relationship as my utmost and foremost priority in terms of my relationship status. I’ve always thought of the relationship being a normal one but more “kinky” I guess. I really want him to be both, but i don’t know how to deal with it.
He also wants me to trust him blindly, without asking any questions and just doing whatever he says, I want to do that too. And I understand that trust is the most important thing in this kind of relationship. I just really want to be the best for him.
Also, I know that Doms have “criteria” that they follow, and we’re both new in this field. I always feel that he’s changing me, and gradually, the people that I see everyday are also noticing the difference, and their comments are not good.
I am really at a loss of what I want to do. Please help?
Charlene. Thank you in advance.
I am a new submissive and am enjoying it so far with the dom I am with. I am confused about something though. I am totally willing to give myself over to him but am in dire need of more everyday attention from him. He is very quiet and somewhat distant. He is respectful of me in public and treats me fine but I need more pghysical and emotional attention. Does asking for this interfere in the sub-dom relationship? Am I supposed to b happy with whatever he is willing to give? Are doms capable of a dual relationship: dominant in bed but more like a boyfriend in public? I really need some advice
Jody,
Thank you for your question. Now is the time to sit down with him and tell him what you need from the relationship. If you need physical and emotional attention more often then tell him that. Give him examples of what you feel is missing. You don’t have to just be happy with what he’s willing to give unless it’s already been talked about and that’s what you both agreed on. Dominants and anyone else for that matter are capable of different responses in bed vs. out in public. Again, you need to talk to him about your feelings. It’s important that both of you are happy and fulfilled so having this talk can only bring your one step closer to understanding what that entails.
Thanks for your response. I have so many questions about this kind of relationship. I really appreciate your help. :)
I really appreciate your advice. If you can email me directly, I have so much more I want to know. I feel really lost in this but am so interested at the same time. I really need a mentor. If you cannot contact me directly, I understand. If there are any others out there who can help, please reply. Thanks!
You are welcome to send me email via the contact page at the top of the site. :)