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Submissive PMS and How to Deal With It
June 13, 2009 by lunaKM [1 views]
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This video post is about how to deal with a submissive bout of PMS.
It’s not your normal run of the mill PMS. You don’t have cramps or bloating or headaches or chills, but your mood is so out of whack that you are getting in trouble just by opening your mouth. You don’t know where your submissive filter went, all you know is that it’s gone and you’re going to be paying for it with every utterance. This is submissive PMS. I suffer from it often and it’s something I’ve learned a few things from to make it easier to get through. Let’s help you out.
What’s the Big Deal?
I’m pretty certain most of you haven’t heard this term before and that’s because I just made it up. You won’t find submissive PMS in any dictionary (urban, BDSM or otherwise), but if you have been submissive for more than a few minutes you know exactly how I’m going to describe it. It starts with the sudden urge to just tell your Dominant to ‘go get it yourself!’ It can lead to mouthing off, acting pissy when there is no real reason behind and when confronted you can’t explain why you are feeling that way in the first place.
Confront It Dead On
A lot of times it’s obvious that you are entering sub PMS and you can work to stop it before it gets your butt in their sling. The moment you notice the ‘get it yourselfs’ creeping into your head, ask to remove yourself from the room or their presence and go refocus. If this means reading or blogging or meditating then go do it. I tend to get my catharsis from blogging but each person is going to find a different way to refocus. If you can identify an underlying thought or problem that caused the PMS you will want to talk to your Dominant about it. Never harbor feelings from your Dominant, even if you think they are trivial. It will help them help you. Win win in any case.
Apologize
After you have refocused, apologize to your Dominant for your slip in behavior or manners. They may not have even noticed it, but that’s not the purpose. The purpose is to make a mental note for you that you have corrected the behavior and are ready to continue serving. An apology is quite beneficial for that.
Resolve
You can’t prevent submissive PMS, but you can resolve to keep it in check. Make it a task to notice it before anyone else and correct it silently. Everyone has bad moods and off days, but our job as submissives and slaves is to make sure it doesn’t cloud our service. This of course is the hardest part. I’m still not there personally. I can’t recognize it sometimes and leave it to my Master noticing and correcting for me; usually not the way I wish it could be handled. Discipline yourself to make sure you can catch your backsliding and keep your backside from catching it for you.
5 Comments
Filed under Mindset, Video Posts
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Octofinder
I regularly suffer from submissive pms and sometimes it happens 2 or 3 times a month! Strange… :)
subtle´s last blog ..I hereby declare it ICOMONYOU day
Hi Luna,
Thanks for these excellent tips. I’m a guy, but I know exactly what you are talking about. I’ve been exploring D/S with my partner for about 2 years now, and I have definitely had those ‘go get it yourself’ days.
Thanks for all the useful into you post here.
-SGD
i had discussed this article with Sir, and he thought it was a wonderful idea. i have felt this way from time to time and i would beat myself up saying i was becoming bratty. i know now that is not the problem, but just human nature. i thank you for wonderful advice on this site. it has been such a great help for me.
My version of submissive PMS is more subtle: i say things that in my head seem ok, even have Sir and Master on the end, but when they come out of my mouth suddenly have some implication i hadn’t considered and did not mean at all. i can’t even tell you how many times i have gotten in trouble that way.
How does one develop a submissive brain-to-mouth filter?