Your training history is the catalog of the past relationships that you have had within a D/s dynamic. You will be documenting the training you received and list the basic development that you can recall being part of your service. If you have a long history with many dominants this could take awhile and be a large part of your Training Resume. The importance of this is not only to help a potential Dominant get to know you and what you like but to learn what sorts of things they don’t have to focus on. The best part of this is that they can see even more if you are compatible with them.
So, say you want to set up a training history, how do you start? Each relationship should be treated the same, whether it was casual, long term, live-in, long distance or online only. Relationships that are short to really long all should be documented. All of them will matter and have an impact on your future.
- Unlike a job resume or CV you should start with your very first relationship.
- Be impartial about your previous partners and don’t share information about them. Information about your training is the focus.
- Unlike a job resume, you need to be detailed and can be long winded. Do not just summarize your experience.
- Rate how well you thrived in the relationship and what you liked best.
The important thing to focus on is the experiences you had and the development you felt you achieved. There is no need to share specific play sessions or interactions with past Dominants.
This is not the place for Dom bashing or exposing your past partners’ flaws. Keep it focused on you, this is your resume.
An Example Relationship
Jane was with Rick for 3 years as a long distance relationship with visits every other month. They focused their time together with pain play and learning positions he liked as well as sexual pleasure. Their time apart she explored online and learned about different forms of service, play, relationships and BDSM. He developed rules for her to follow to maintain her appearance, keep in contact with him daily and a meditation ritual. They never ventured to any local BDSM community and kept most of their play in the bedroom.
How would you document your history if you were Jane? The following is an idea for a historical profile for your resume.
Length of relationship
: 3 years
Type of relationship:
Long Distance Relationship with bi-monthly visits
Rules followed during relationship:
Appearance, Contact, and Meditation. If you can recall specific rules, list them here.
Relationship Focus:
Mostly pain play and sexual submission. Developed submission through online reading and blog exploration. Also learned a lot about BDSM play A, B and C.
Be thorough! List as much as you can remember about the items you focused your attention on.
Training:
Submissive Positioning, appropriate speech during scene, sexual service.
Struggles you encountered:
Feeling sheltered, no one to talk to, no face-to-face contact with anyone that was in the lifestyle.
Why did the relationship end?
Distance strain grew too much.
Building Your Personal History
The above steps are just introductory items that you can include in your history. Make it personal and give it personality. You are developing your living document. I encourage everyone to give this a try with your current or previous relationship. What do you learn about yourself and what you look for in a relationship? This history could very well hold clues for you!
